This week Gallup Polls released a survey with good news for Christian’s everywhere. Pro-Choice is at a record low. While the number of Americans who are in favor of abortion has declined, it is still a staggering 41%. While I disagree with contraceptives for various reasons, I found the following comment on the Internet that got me thinking about “planned parenthood” and how it compares to Christian family planning.

Abortion due to the incompetence of using contraceptive is murder – Author unknown, Publisher Twitter.

Abortion is premeditated murder and desensitizes all participants to the value of a human life. It costs money. Money that America doesn’t have. Many doctor’s in low income communities receive subsidies (tax dollars) for their office, staff, pills, equipment and even their own salary. Let’s not forget the medical that the women in these low income communities use. All of this get’s paid for by Americans, 59% of which don’t agree with the practice. While that number isn’t as high as I would personally like it to be, it is still more that the 51% required for a majority rule.

God has a specific design for family life including not having premarital sex and only reproducing with one partner. God’s sexual design for humans creates a natural birthing cycle with a minimum of 9 months in between births. It eliminates STDs, psychological disorders, and ensures the strong support that is necessary to form critical thinking patterns in a child’s brain.  Below is an outline for family life from courtship to raising children as designed by God.


The first step in finding a spouse (in contrast to a lifelong sexual partner) is to find someone that shares the faith with you. If they don’t share your faith, you’ve just reduced yourself to breeding and releasing pheromones. Most people look for a partner that has superficial things in in common with them. Similar interests in clothes, music, haircuts, shoes, vehicles, etc. do not form the foundations for a solid marriage.  Your future spouse should have the following qualities if you are going to raise children that continue to worship the same God you do.

  • Your future spouse should believe (not agrees with) the same things you do spiritually, morally, and socially.
  • They should be willing to express those beliefs without fear. Someone who can’t express what they truly believe is not ready to have the mature communications that are required in a relationship.
  • They need to to put you first. Before work, before friends, before birth family.
  • You need to practice your faith together so you can grew spiritually and continue to bond over the years.

The Bible teaches that this is exactly what God wants for us in a relationship.

Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?  (2 Corinthians 6:14 KJV)

So that we may boldly say, The Lord is my helper, and I will not fear what man shall do unto me.  (Hebrews 13:6 KJV)

Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. (Genesis 2:24 KJV)

Speaking to yourselves in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody in your heart to the Lord; (Ephesians 5:19 KJV)

You need to be with someone that is on the same level as you mentally, physically and spiritually. You can’t be with someone that is always lagging behind or with someone your always going to catch up to. It’s exhausting and creates resentment. Being equally yoked is the more important than having a trophy spouse who will make you feel inferior and who will feel used when they find out you’re not interested in them, only how they make you look.

Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee.  (Exodus 20:12 KJV)

Honoring your parents is the first commandment with a promise (a long life). However, once your married, your spouse comes first. If they come before your mother and father, there is no point in trying to argue that work, friends, entertainment, or hobbies should ever be prioritized above them.

Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. (Matthew 19:6 KJV)

Jesus made it clear that divorce was a sin and given by Moses “because of the hardness of your hearts”. Jesus-Is-Lord.com and Jesus-Is-Savior.com both have good studies on why divorce is an act of un-forgiveness. Marriage is not only a lifelong commitment to your spouse, but also a vow to God that you are going to live by God’s design.

Ephesians is one of the few books that specifically gives guidance for family life. It’s a short book of 6 chapters. I recommend reading it with your spouse often. You can’t wear it out. It’s almost 2,000 years old.


Engagement is a societal ritual that sets you up for lifelong indecisiveness. If you’ve dated someone long enough to know that they love God, and have prayed about it, you should get married. There is no need to wait until you have the money for the prefect wedding or honeymoon, you have the rest of your lives to create days filled with love, awe, wonder, and warmth. Everyday of your marriage should be like a verse from the Song of Solomon.

How fair and how pleasant art thou, O love, for delights!  (Song of Solomon 7:6 KJV)


The Bible doesn’t offer too many verses on parenting, but the ones that it does are very clear on what is required.

He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes. (Proverbs 13:24 KJV)

Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.  (Proverbs 22:6 KJV)

And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.  (Ephesians 6:4 KJV)

Raising kids requires love and discipline . You are charged with teaching them in the faith, just as a pastor is charged with guiding a flock.  An important thing to keep in mind is that you have to learn to be more like them.

And said, Verily I say unto you, Except ye be converted, and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven.  (Matthew 18:3 KJV)

Take heed that ye despise not one of these little ones; for I say unto you, That in heaven their angels do always behold the face of my Father which is in heaven.  (Matthew 18:10 KJV)

But whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea. (Matthew 18:6 KJV)

As your raising kids with your spouse keep in mind that you need to be more like them. If the world was full of happy children that loved God, we would all be in Heaven already.